Have you every recalled talking to someone who does not listens to you, but instead keeps talking on and on about his/ her own ideas? Have you as an individual felt that it is very hard to spread your ideas across to people when communicating with them, as there are a lot of interruptions? Do you feel that is very hard to keep quiet for just 10 seconds and listen to the person that is talking thus understanding what he or she is saying? I am sure that you have encountered such an experience before in your life, be it talking to your subordinates, your bosses, your friends, listening to lecturers etc. This includes me as well. Listening is an important skill that many of us lack. It is a skill that seems easy, but in fact is very hard to practice. And when one masters it, he would be successful in whatever he does in life. Reason being that if one masters the skill of listening; he is able to reach out to the speaker, hence connect with him effectively to getting a job done. By doing so its saves a lot of precious time as well as strength conveying the message across. Also, listening helps cope with anger, as by listening, one is able to listening to the other party, than be understood, minimizing conflict.
Like all others, I have experience such an incident before (poor listening skills). In the past, during secondary school, during lessons, I used to talk and talk and talk and talk nonstop, not bothering about the poor teacher in front of the class trying to compete with our voices. She was trying to raise her voice to compete with the noise we were generating, at the same time, trying to impart precious and valuable knowledge to us, which would be beneficiary in the future. However, I was obvious to that fact, till the first Mid-year examination of Secondary 3. When I took back my results, you could say that it was a knock out for me. I was shocked and lost. It was the first time I just- passed all my subjects for my exams, as that has never happened to me before in the past. I kept reflecting and reflect every night why did I score so badly although I did study for my exams. I just could not get it, as well as accepting that fact. Not forgetting the scolding I’ve received from my parents. I’ve only realized my mistake only when my teacher confronted me when I returned the papers to her. She left me with a saying which I would remember for life. “All pride comes with one’s downfall. The art of listening would be your only savior”. Like what a normal human would do, I went home, digested it and made sense to me. Since then, whenever a teacher is speaking, I would pay 100% attention to him/her so as to get the best from it (lesson). Therefore from that day onwards, whenever I am tempted to talk while someone is speaking, I would always remember what my teacher had told me.
How do you feel is someone spits in your face for no reason? How do you feel when you were being reprimanded for doing nothing wrong in the first place? How do you feel when no one bothers about what you say or thinks? I am sure that a normal human would feel annoyed and angry, hence expressing that anger in different ways. Some might choose to let anger go into their heads, thus being controlled by the anger instead of controlling it. Such people often regret what they did during that moment of impulse. Others might just choose to shut off from the whole world. While others might just choose to walk away from the problem and not return to it. Again, I am also not exempted, and had encountered such an experience before.
This time, such an incident happened to me during kindergarden, when I was about 5 years old. I had an argument with a fellow classmate during play time over a toy. During that period in time, I used to be very bad tempered and always want things to go in my way. And what happens if I don’t get what I want? It depends. If it was an adult, I might cry and cry and cry and cry and cry till I get my ways (as I am helpless compared to them). However, if it was a fellow, same aged classmate, the tendency of me letting anger get the job done is high. Sadly, I poke that poor guy’s eyes with my fingers, resulting in him screaming and crying, snatched the toy (toy car), and deny all claims. As I was still young and immature during that time, little me did not know that I was being monitored constantly by the teacher. Of course, I did not escape the punishment from my teacher as well as scolding from my classmate’s mom and my own mom. This is an example of an outburst, where I took control of the situation by using brute strength and anger. But not to be worried, I have matured a lot ever since that day, and have a better tolerance for anger, hence better anger management. Some effective ways of managing anger which I find useful would be to laugh and take 10 deep breadths before facing the problem. It has worked for me, so it should work for u as well.
Have you ever felt that there are too many things to do but you just have too little time? Does it seem that with the same 24 hours, why others can achieve more than you can? Again, just like the art of listening, time management is also something that is simple and easy, but very hard to carry out. I am sure that while you are reading this blog entry, such questions might be familiar to you. Neither are they alien to me. I have always experience a lack to time, even up till now – today, this very minute.
However, I know that there are ways in which we are able to better enhance our time to use the fullest out of every second. And if I can do it, so can you. So let me teach u the most effective way. Firstly, the most basic thing is to get and set up a time table. By having a time table, one would be able to do what he has set out to do in the first place, hence not straying into something else. Secondly, by prioritizing what one has to do with the day, he/she would and can effectively utilize the precious amount of time one has. Am currently using a specific time table as planned according to the prioritizing of work done. Though I might stray at times, and am not really sticking much to it, but it is better to begin than never. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect. So long as we keep practicing, I am sure that we would be able to put our time to better usage, and I if I am trying, so must you!
Would like to end with a quote by Guan Yin Tzu, Don’t waste time calculating your chances of success and failure. Just fix your aim and begin.
After having gone through so many LMS (life management skills) I have learnt a lot of useful skills that am able to apply next time in my life. Examples would be anger management, time management etc, which are so real in daily life. Not only it would improve how I look at life, it would also change me into a better person, not only for myself, but the community as well.